Been a month......

since things in both our lives changed. It's never gonna be the same again. Something that should have meant to happen in a beautiful way is utterly destroyed by my own hands and my stupid ego. Should I had realized this earlier both of us would have been happier right now.

Ya, I screwed up, big time. No doubt about that. While people says that both parties have their responsibilties to contribute to today's situation, one of them definitely will bear a bigger part of it, whom in this case, is me. She had given me countless chances but my stubbornness got the better of me.

Now, sitting alone in this little room of mine, I can't help but thinking back and regret all the things I've done to her which I shouldn't have in the first place. Looking at and thinking of her smiles just don't make things any better. I shouldn't have look at those memories they said but how not to? Especially when you have decided to spend the next chapter of your life with her and the next thing you realise that it is no longer possible?

In the past, I could easily tell people to move on when they are seriously hurt, not realising and understanding the pain that they are going through. Today I feel that exact pain and it is definitely harder to practise than preaching on it, especially when the best thing/event/person that had happened to my life had been crushed by my own hands.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

oh my. what's with the sudden bad omen.

i'm facing a very similar situation if not the same. and alot of bad things happened recently.

come out sometime..

ginök